Reflection & Gratitude

The process of moving belongings from one place to another brings up a lot of different issues, as you might expect.

For myself in particular, I've moved many many times. And the process does seem to get easier in some ways, but more difficult in others.
I.e. the logistics of filling a box with an appropriate weight and balance vs. once again feeling uprooted and an indefinable loss.

Don't get me wrong.
I love having a clean slate.
And there's something oddly satisfying seeing a house full of boxes.
We get the keys to the new place this afternoon... but I won't hold my breath.
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Terin stepped into a clearing. A tall grassed meadow. Trees hung low at the edges, as if some kind of unseen power kept them from intruding into the lovely place. Peaceful place. The sun had only just begun its ascent, peaking over the trees into the overgrown grassy field and filled his vision with a sense of belonging. This was where he was supposed to be.
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Also T-6 days until I visit my family down south.


What else can you say about transitions like this one?
That it feels like I may be one step closer to finding the place I can finally make a home?
Living in flux takes a toll, but it seems necessary to some degree.
That we're sowing our seeds and have crops to look forward to.
Not now, but later.

This year will be the final year we live in the city.
The first year was spent in chaos.
We hated the fact you could hear people talking right outside our bathroom window on the street...
The dumpsters sat right outside our first floor windows as well, which added an aromatherapy to match our shitty attitudes.
My partner was depressed to find only one job that called back, for 8$ an hour, part time, after having earned a Master's level education....

Then we got a little more used to it.
We moved, to a 4th floor apartment.
And although the dumpsters were still close... the air was much cleaner.
We had a balcony this time, with a view of downtown.
So we stayed for 3 years.
And in these years we've changed quite a bit.
We maximized our opportunities and began taking advantage of our time here, rather than hating every minute of it.

So now comes the final year.
I see it as a bell curve.

The peak was my partner deciding the next step of a career, and mine becoming much more manageable.
I'd like to say I have an idea of what might be in store for us, but I'm really not.
I can only speculate.
We have a list of things to do before we leave, and are keeping them in mind per season.
i.e. Apple picking in the fall, holiday displays at the end of the year, festivals, trips that are easier to make given our location.

However, no matter what the next year holds, I know we'll be using the things we've learned along the way and appreciating them with more gratitude and maturity than when we came.

"Gratitude is a twofold love- love coming to visit us and love running to greet a welcome guest." - Henry Van Dyke.

I don't know who Henry is, but this image is a lot like what comes to mind when I read it.
Does this count as expressing my gratitude?
I don't know, but I'll do it some more anyway.